The one thing you should expect when it comes to aging parents is the unexpected. Though I really can’t truly say this was unexpected since we kind of knew it was coming. The signs were all there. Yes, I got a call from the hospital at 6:00 a.m. saying my mother-in-law was confused and needed calming down. So I threw on some clothes and away I went!
This was going to be a long day to begin with. I had an appointment with the neurologist for Dad’s Parkinson’s checkup this morning and then an appointment with the cardiologist this afternoon for my mother. So why not throw in a quick trip 30 miles to the hospital to calm down my mother-in-law.
Alzheimer’s is interesting to witness but even wilder when you throw in heavy painkillers and anesthesia. It causes something called delirium. Delirium is not good. Thankfully, we knew that she was susceptible to developing delirium so they took steps to try to minimize it. For my mother-in-law, the problems happen when she sleeps. She goes somewhere in her sleep and wakes up thinking that is what the true reality is and not simply sleeping in her bed.
She woke up with an interesting tale this time. Someone picked her up in a taxi and took her to this other hospital like place. They had her tied to the bed with all these people coming in and pointing at her. To say she was mad was an understatement. She just knew that was what happened. Nothing I could say would change her mind. I’ve learned though. I just go with the flow. I comment like it really happened and don’t try to tell her otherwise.
That is the best thing to do with Alzheimer’s and dementia. Just go along with it. When you try to tell them they are wrong, it makes matters much, much worse. They then become agitated and you just lose. Plain and simply. You lose any argument where you try to tell them it didn’t happen.
So the day started with rushing to the hospital to calm down Mom #2, then pick up Dad and Mom #1 for their doctor appointments, and then on to helping Mom #2 get checked into her new room at a skilled nursing facility. Long day. Almost normal day. All this on what would have been my grandmother’s birthday. I’ve been trying to think about when she was born. I know she would be well over 100 if she were still here.
Happy Birthday, Grandma! Love you!